Great Deal

I have a super duper deal for you on our website. I have a promo code for my friends and family that will get you 40% off all of our bracelets, hair bows, and necklaces. Just enter the promo code SAUCY1019 at checkout and the 40% will be taken off any of the above listed items. We have been wanting to offer this for a while but have been waiting for our programmer to work out all the kinks. Please let me know if you have any problems with it. Happy shopping!

Update

I'm playing catch-up because I have been a complete slacker and haven't blogged about the fun stuff we've been doing. We will start all the way back on Labor Day when the girls went to a Diamondbacks game with their dad. The first picture is from this most recent trip. The second picture is from last year but I couldn't resist posting it because it's one of my favorites.


Can we go now?!

At the beginning of October we spent a night at a cabin with friends and then another night at our ward campout. Luckily for us we had other friends with a cabin close-by so we didn't have to brave the accomodations at Camp LoMia. The girls had a blast playing non-stop for two days. And we really do love the people in our ward so Devon and I had a good time too.





Halloween was busy for us, as always. We had two sets of grandparents, an aunt, and two trunk-or-treats to visit. The girls dressed up as 50's girls this year and loved their poodle skirts.

If Only

I have often thought that if I could know the reason for this trial that it would be a lot easier. Maybe my girls need extra time with their mom. Maybe they need extra time with each other. I could wonder about maybes all day. It would be a lot easier to be patient if I knew a concrete reason. Then it would all make sense and I could wait.

Alas, that is not going to happen. And for good reason. Without an answer I am forced to live by faith. And even better, to strive for greater faith. Otherwise, it just feels mean and senseless. It is through turmoil and struggle that we have the greatest potential for spiritual growth. I would never have believed that if I hadn't experienced myself. But I know that my faith and reliance on the Lord has increased mightily because of the last three and a half years.

I learned in my institute class recently that the Beatitudes build upon each other. They are not singular but come as a package. This was amazing to me. It is beautiful and more meaningful to me when read this way and I wanted to share it with you.

Matthew 5:3-9
3 Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
5 Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.
6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.
7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.
9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

Do you see it? Do you see the pattern of trials in your life? Do you see how when you are brought low that you then must turn to Him? Do you see that this is His way of refining us? It stinks sometimes. But I know the Lord desires to teach me something through this storm. And knowing the "why" would dissolve the teaching moment. I still wonder and probably always will, but I'm grateful for the Lord's wisdom in allowing me to grow.

Sugar Plums Boutique

Amy and I are participating in another boutique this weekend. It will be Friday from 10:00 to 7:00 and Saturday from 9:00 to 4:00. The address is 2963 E. Robin Lane in Gilbert which is in Circle G Ranch off Higley just south of Elliot. It should be fun. See you there!

Angels Among Us

One of my favorite talks from the most recent General Conference was given by Elder Holland. He talked about the influence of angels both mortal and immortal in our lives. I'm surrounded by angels. I don't always realize it in the moment, but it's true. My patriarchal blessing promises me this and I often forget to watch for the evidence.

I know that I have at least two heavenly angels--my Nana and my Uncle Kent. I have occasionally remarked that maybe the reason I don't have my baby yet is because Nana can't let him go. She was a really good squeezer. It's actually comforting to think that if I can't be loving on my baby maybe she is.

But I also have earthly angels. The first is my husband. Don't get me wrong, he drives me crazy just like every good husband, but he is the most patient, loving man. When I first came back from Idaho after the miscarriage it was a little rough. I was difficult to deal with because I wasn't the most emotionally stable person. But he was patient and has supported me when I've needed it.

The second angel is my mother. My dad's great too but there's something about a mother in this situation that I'm quite sure I couldn't live without. It was my mom who accompanied me to the hospital and was with me when I found out my baby was gone. It was my mom who stayed with me while I had my D and C. It was my mom who nursed me back to health physically and emotionally. (Devon had already started the drive back to AZ when this all happened. He was able to come back but missed out on all the hospital time.) I'm quite sure that it was a tender mercy of the Lord that my miscarriage occurred while I was at Bear Lake. I think He knew that I would need my mom to help me find my way through the first few weeks of this experience. And she continues to be the person who keeps me focused spiritually and emotionally. I couldn't do this without her.

In addition, I am surrounded by a multitude of women in my ward who I view as angels. I have the great blessing of learning from other women who have suffered, who have grieved, who have ultimately allowed their experiences to mold them into disciples of Christ. I desire to be like them. I desire to have the love of the Savior stamped on my face, and in my words, and in my life. I desire to have this whole horrible, gut-wrenching experience make me into the person I'm meant to be. I desire to someday be an angel for someone else as they learn from my trial. Of course I still desire first and foremost to be a mother again. I ache for the baby that I know is meant for this family. But I know that my will is not the Father's will. I know that He will show me what is best. I know that He can make me the best person I can be if I will follow Him and trust in His plan through this storm. I know it will pass. I know this valley will lead to higher mountains than I have experienced before if I can just be patient. Patience is not one of my virtues. I guess it will have to be now.

Why Me?

My most recent struggle is with understanding why some people get what they pray for and some people don’t. My friend (you know who you are and that I love you) has recently had the things she has been fretting over and praying for fall right into her lap in a miraculous way in two months’ time. What makes her desires more needful than mine? Why does she get a miracle and I don’t? My friend’s experience has built her faith in Heavenly Father’s ability to work miracles in our lives when we are living righteously. It begs the question: what am I doing wrong? While I’m sure there are lots of things I could improve on, I’m not doing anything “wrong." I’m doing all the right things. I fulfill my church calling, I try to be a good mom and wife, I try to serve others. What more can I do? The answer is nothing. There is nothing more I can do—I’ve already done everything in my power to get a baby here. There’s some reason that a baby is not meant for our family at this time.

So now I have to try to find peace in this life that I never expected. I have to learn to be faithful in the face of great difficulty. I have to believe that Heavenly Father hears my prayers and desires to answer them in the way that is best for me. But it’s hard. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.